let me get my facts straight.No matter how fucked up or how loser-ish i may seem,in some obvious aspects, such as ACADEMICALLY,i am better than you.Sorry I had to touch a nerve there but i mean,i learn from the best don't i?I have got so many things to say to you,and i'll say it here.Writing things here will be ten times better because then will you be able to see what i had to say,and then after all this shit, you can go for another bitching session,i wouldnt give two fucks anymore.
First, let me admit that yeah,like a fish to a bait,i reacted to your childish acts,bitching around,making up/assuming things & 'trying to get people to side you'.So for once, i'll stoop low to your level & do the exact same thing, only without backstabbing.You know what, for 3 whole years,3 whole fucking years, I treated you as my bestfriend, my confidante, a reliable friend who just had some rebel issues.I always thought it was my responsibility to help you walk the right path, but seeing how you are so headstrong and rebellious, obviously all my nagging were in vain.That's okay, that must have been partly my fault because I cant change/control people.But you know what? Throughout those 3 years, I was always the one who initiated a clarification whenever we quarrelled, i was the one who always apologised although at times you were the one who did wrong.Why?BECAUSE I KNOW IT TAKES TWO HANDS TO CLAP.
Then the birthday issue, was it my wrong you got into trouble?Was it my wrong your Choir teacher already knew about it so your dad found out too?F.Y.I-be fucking glad your choir teacher is showing so much grace to you because if she hadnt,you and your friend would have been in deepshit with the school discipline.Was it my fault that you stayed out of your house for 3 days 2 nights?Was it my fault your father knew where i live?Was it my fault your father was worrying about some daughter like you the whole night,wondering where could she be?Was it my fault I didnt nag you on your birthday?Was it my fault i had to tell your father about your boyfr & all the contact numbers?Is it my fault your boyfr should know way better,yet he is angry at me because your dad knows about him?Was it my fault,when in the end you said you would face the consequences,but because you somehow were so afraid of facing your father's wrath, you had to lie again?Your poor father actually believed you,yknow?And you sided some guy who(no offense), is old enough to think responsibly,but chose to put his wants infront of responsibility.I think the phrase 'love is blind' totally fits here.Seeing how you always gush about how handsome he is,how he looks like edward cullen,practically just gushing about his looks and making use of his money to get things your parents will never get you.Boyfriends arent for you to make use of,okay?And doesnt mean you have a so called 'hot' boyfriend, you become some incredulously big fuck.So i think its time you stop bragging about him already.And dont even think Im jealous or envious of you.I just pity that guy because he isnt even married to you and he has to support your cravings,when he has his mom,himself,his education to support.But I digress.Initially I thought I was guilty, but sorry, for this, you're the one at fault and for ONCE,you should take the blame.Stop pushing it to others.
Oh and to the other friend who was involved, was it my fault you followed suit with her,and you blame me that you had to bribe your cousin with 10 dollars just so she would answer all the phonecalls that day?Why not think logically like how you can,if you hadnt got influenced, you wouldnt even have been in that shitty situation.
Yeah, after that everything started going downhill, i dont blame you for not being able to trust me anymore,but if you were mature enough like how you always try to dress,then perhaps you would have known that I didnt mean any harm to you.What's more,i clearly remember you saying after the EOY'08 that you think your dad somehow knows you are in a relationship.If your dad somehow knows, why were you so shit-scared that i told your dad about it? Why, cos your bf would get into deep shit? Sorry to burst your bubble, thats HIS RESPONSIBLITY,HE SHOULD LEARN FROM HIS MISTAKES.
Valentines day.That was just some small misunderstanding, i dont understand why you had to go around pissing and moaning about me, calling me a fat bitch and scoffing at the idea of me asking your friend if she could lend me her make-up that day.At least I dont wear make-up every time i go out,hiding my haggard face behind a pile of fake-up sometimes even in school.But yeah, i respect your decision for putting on make-up,that's your choice.But was it any of your business, did i even ASK you?What, you were damn offended that day because of me?What about me, I was DAMN OFFENDED BY YOU TOO.Seeing how you assume things alllllllll the fucking time,and expecting me to follow your orders happily when you didnt ask me along ,ASSUMING i would be feeling awkward.Since when did you care about how I would feel so much huh,since when?You didnt even ask my opinion, when in actual fact I wouldnt have minded at all,being there listening to you and her singing chinese songs.Its called courtesy, which I think you lack of.Sorry I was too direct but thats the only way I can say it clearly without missing my point.And what, I was jealous? PFFT,i was just speechless that you have seriously not a bit of courtesy in you.
Yeah, i admit! I bitched about you too,how you think you're all that when (no offense) a lot of people dislike who you are now,and in case you dont know,much more than you think. Again, I know many people dislike me too, well thats their opinion,I cant make everyone like me. But for you, those people ,including me, used to LIKE you.Until you morphed into someone who puts her boyfriend first,well other than that,seriously changing into someone nobody could comprehend.Im not here to make people take sides, theres no point having those reliable friends you have now yknow.Because afterall you bitched about them too, or if you havent, you definitely will, and you'll slowly fall out.
About being academically better,that's a written fact.What, you scoffed at me that day just because I mentioned I did a research on JC and the subjects they offer? I shuold be the one scoffing at you, because no matter how much you research or read on JCs, you can never enrol in one(not even in the lousiest JC in s'pore),judging by how you got such meagre grades for your latest exam.Why, was i being too bitchy? Sorry, but this is how i'll pay back to you, so you can eat this up & try to pull your socks because gosh, im so sorry, you cant even get into the poly course you want to get in!What, Lasalle?SOTA?NAFA?MDIS? you still need some brains to get in, pitiful you.So take this advice for once, stop gallivanting,& start being a proper sec 4 student who is going to take her 'O' levels!Your dad is just too good for you, how he has to pay for expensive tuition when you bring home failures.
After all this, Im still bothered by the fact you like to get a strong grip of people and influence them like fuck till they themselves become people unrecognizable inside. Partly they may be the ones to blame too, because they are the ones who chose to succumb,who chose to walk the same path as you. It is only a matter of time before they start to realise you may be a wild out-going party animal, but deep inside, you're just a liar, someone who lies about every.single.little.thing., you backstab everyone, probably even them!Don't even deny, because I went through that before.Obviously you would say I am in no right position to crap about this, but unlike you, at least I tell them in the end and i apologise.Or if I didnt, Im apologising now. So to the 2 friends who are now 'BFFs' with her, there were times I bitched about you, how i think one of you is really money-faced but having a friend like her, you got all rights because she owes you so much money.If she has paid you back everything, thats a miracle, the only good thing that i noticed in her.& I dont understand why you're treating me coldly at times? Because first of all, there is nothing cold-ish going on between you and me, I dont even have any qualms against you.But you wanna side your friend, so be it.I hope your effort pays well.As for the other friend, honestly I think right now you're just thinking oh im having fun, this is good, but slowly, you'll realise sometimes,experience that can never be erased(okay maybe with laser),isnt worth experiencing now just because you think 'you might die tomorrow'.Thats a foolish motto to live on,because if you really abide by that motto, you might as well have sex with a stranger for the experience!Why not, you might die tomorrow as a virgin!Honestly during sec 3 i thought you like to fake the slang and act like a bimbo? But some people are like that and besides, everyone has gone through that phase before.And right now, you're also in another phase, which you seriously need to get out of soon.Im not saying this because im trying to get you in my side or trying to appear like a friendly person, im saying this because at least I know you are humane enough to think logically,you know what is right and wrong,you still have sense.And afterall, i didnt even have any grudges against you,did i? I just sincerely hope you guys will learn something from this one day.You can hate me all you want, but you cant hate me for some things which you know as a true friend I did right.You can bitch too after reading all this, but you know that what I wrote are all true, that is if you ever even put yourselves in my shoes or tried to clarify with me and understand what is going through my head.
Anyway, to that person in particular, you want to hate me for being so outfront and bitchy, go on. I've already said whatever I need to say and wanted to say.You can continue bitching about me again, I seriously wont care anymore because I know better.Its just a waste I had to spend 3 years having happy memories and knowing it will only always be a memory, nothing more.
However, thank you for teaching me a lesson on who I should trust and who I should depend on as a bestfriend.And thank you for not being my bestfriend anymore, this gives me a chance to find someone better, and learn from my mistake, to actually be glad I survived all this. Honestly I think I learnt a whole lot observing and discovering all the snideful things you did and do. Really, thank you very much :) I hope you read this and prove to everyone you're true to whatever I had mentioned. Thank you for reading all this ( if you really did ) till here. Oh, you can go brag/lie about how you skipped some parts because you thought I crap too much, I know you read everything. Bye
